College, as it is for many, has been a journey of personal discovery. In recent years this has led me to my discovery of my lack of belief in religious superstition and the waxing and waning of mental illness. The act of leaving Christianity when I was also struggling with anxiety made things especially difficult. Even though this decision was very personal, the act of leaving religion is a large act of extroversion and took bravery when stepping away from community and sometimes friends and family. Turning to atheism especially, still gathers a negative social stigma that makes being an introvert even more challenging.
However, in having these realizations near simultaneously in my life has only made me stronger as I am more able to engage with others. Proclaiming my atheism showed me that I am strong enough to be myself without the overbearance of mental illness. Turning to atheism and rejecting the thought of an afterlife or eternal reward has made my one life, my only chance, all the more precious to live as my fullest self, to champion my depression and anxieties and be me.
In this body of work I document and share personal internal thoughts in a way that I hope everyone can view and experience with thought. In viewing art, we are often drawn to make comparisons to our own lives, but I encourage viewers to also try stepping out of themselves and into a different paradigm. I offer these personal experiences for viewers to engage with and hopefully find a new way of navigating belief systems and personal struggle.
Blood of the Bible: The blood of the son does not make up for the sins of the father
Bible & Ink
The God of the Old Testament is a violent and vengeful God. If you count the reported numbers in the Bible, God kills 2,476,633 people. However, this does not include unreported numbers including those killed in Noah’s flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, plagues, famines, etc. If you include these, God’s upper estimate is 25 million deaths on his hands.
Satan’s kill count is 10, the seven sons and thee daughters of Job which God allows as a part of a bet. His upper estimate is 60.
I took these numbers and calculated how many deaths happen per page on average in the Bible (about 8 September 11ths per page) and from that, found that there are 31.62 deaths per word.
2 words of the Bible
My second project can be viewed here.